The Ironical Chronicle LoLyfe.co.uk

25Oct/010

Cali – Day 7 – Pacific Heights

After another 'greasy' Steven's Breakfast we head straight to the Pacific Heights area of San Francisco. The houses here are some of the most beautiful buildings I have ever seen, incomparable to anything in the UK, unless you think of old shows like 'Upstairs Downstairs' - the old Victorian style 3 up/1 down style places. The views from up here are phenomenal too. The 'Heights' are situated pretty much at the very top of what is the hill that SFO is built upon. You can see nearly all around the city and we spend hours just sitting on a bench in the park awestruck by it all.
The weather is warm and sunny and we take a lot of video footage, unlike yesterday, where I think we must have shot about 35 seconds total!
Whilst taking a breather on a bench in Alta Plaza Park, we decide to try and find the mall we passed the other day on the way to Yosemite. My 'guesstimate' was that it was near a BART station called Dublin, which happened to be the last stop on the line. We bite the bullet and head off.
From Dublin station, sources advise us to take a #10 bus to Stoneridge Mall. This was a large centre, but still not the one seen from the freeway.
We spend the evening shopping and head back to the hotel after relieving ourselves of vast amounts of cash ...

24Oct/010

Cali – Day 6 – Berkeley

Woken up by Housekeeping, this is one of the more annoying things about being on vacation. The decision of whether to stick the 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the handle or not, withstanding, it's still a pain in the bum being woken up by the maid. We tell her that we'll be about half an hour and we quickly shower and head out across the road to Stevens Cafe for a 'Home Cooked' breakfast. Not as good as Denny's, but it sufficed.
Over breakfast we decide to take one of the walks from the DK tourist guide book, Berkeley looks like the best bet. The BART takes us there easily, and we walk around campus during the lunch hour. It's really busy and every student seems to be either organizing or attending some sort of rally or club or activity. It was totally weird, like scenes from a movie - Nerds and Jocks segregated and a bunch of Pot Heads made the jigsaw complete.
We stop off in a College store where we pick up a Berkeley T-shirt each and Linn finally buys her pair of Adidas Superstars - only to take them back because she sees another pair that she prefers the look of in another store further down the block. That store unfortunately didn't hold her size, so she was once again - 'SuperStarLess'. Why she felt it necessary to take the original pair back before checking the other store baffles me, but then I have never tried to second guess Old Red.
The shopping in and around Berkeley is cool, we spend hours mooching about the various boutiques and stop off for many a coffee on our travels, but in the end we head back on the BART and head for the San Francisco Shopping Center. It's here that we at last find Linn a pair of Superstars that she felt happy enough with, so I pay for them and tell her in no uncertain terms that I will not be taking them back - although I feel pretty confident that these will probably be worn out in a very short time, she seems to love them ...
A long walk to Van Ness to the movies again. This time we pick another Hollywood take on a comic book - "From Hell" is the latest attempt at making an Alan Moore masterpiece into contrived drivel. Actually, I quite enjoyed the flick, as did Linn ... mostly.
We walk further up Van Ness to the Hard Rock Cafe, where we have our ritualistic meals. Pasta for Linn and I have my usual Pig Sandwich washed down with Lite Beer. We both have problems finishing out meal, in fact we feel a little sick. It's either the long day or the food, we can't decide, although one thing we can decide on is that we shout for a cab back to the hotel instead of walking.

23Oct/010

Cali – Day 5 – Yosemite

A really early start and a really nice day out. We're up at 5.30 a.m. and back at the hotel at 8 p.m. (just in time for Buffy!)
Not much to do apart from enjoy the view on the 5 hour journey to the park. We pass a cool field of windmills otherwise it was plains all the way.
Yosemite itself was lush still and a short walk after a sandwich for lunch got us plenty of great views. We boarded the bus and our guide/driver stopped off at the most picturesque spots including the bottom of El Captain where we were able to see rock climbers doing there thing. What was really cool was using the zoom on the video camera to spy on these guys. We could actually see them moving up the face and also see some people hanging in sleeping bags taking a rest! Totally cool!

After a long drive back to Wendy's for a burger, then watched some TV in the hotel room. A cool episode of Buffy and a confusing one of Roswell. One noteworthy thing though, a show called '24' is coming starring Keifer Sutherland - it looks really cool! I hope it comes on TV back home...

22Oct/010

Cali – Day 4 – San Francisco

11:10 a.m. - Denny’s!!
We get the 'F Tram' along Market to Fisherman's Wharf until we find the Denny's we spied the other day, but alas, no 'Cinnamon Swirl Slam' for Linn. It must either be a seasonal special or something that's only offered in Florida ... Never mind, she makes up for it with pancakes.
We eat breakfast and decide to take the day as it comes, but the main idea is to do a bit of sight seeing and plenty of shopping.

We take a long exhausting walk up to Lombard St., 'The Crookedist Street in the World', and then we walk some more into and through China Town.
After even more walking we turn up on Union Square where window was a necessity. We hit Macy's to look for Russ's socks and some Calvin Klein homeware. We don't pick up the socks as they're all knee length. I can't see Russ wearing those somehow!
On the top floor of Macy's is The Cheesecake Factory. We sit outside on the roofdeck in the shade under a heat lamp and eat cheesecake and drink latte - nice.

Fisherman's Wharf is our next port of call. Linn bought a Paul Frank top in a store sale on Pier 39 the other day - it was sooo cheap! So we head back to the same store to see if I can find anything. I manage to pick up an Oakley hoody which is heavy, but stylish!
We eat at Café 8 - Linn has a crab salad and I have a seafood pasta that rocks.

The F Tram takes us back to the Hotel where we have an early night ready for tomorrow’s trip to Yosemite.

21Oct/010

Cali – Day 3 – Alcatraz & Lagging

I'm writing this as my first ever jet lag sets in. I've never experienced it before but I think the fact that I'm suffering with a bit of flu as well has enabled it to take hold. On top of that it's been an awesome, but tiring day.

Early start which is mainly due to lack of sleep, but also as we need to get our coach for the city tour.
San Francicso is totally cool. After the tour we head off to Alcatraz, which is cooler. By the time the evening comes along we're so wiped that we decide to stay in the hotel for dinner. A really nice restarurant downstairs serves us up a steak dinner and we head for bed.

20Oct/010

Cali – Day 2 – San Francisco

Restless night for Linn, which means a restless night for me too. She'll be wiped out by this afternoon - poor bint. She must have gone to the loo every hour from abut 1 a.m.
She's had this problem before; crossing time zones seems to affect her like no one I've ever known. It takes me back a few years to when she came out to meet me in Denver and had a near nervous breakdown!
Anyway, we're up at 7.30, we unpack and shower and head out of the room by 9. The bed is comfortable the room is small but adequate.

First thing we notice when getting outside is the area we're in. Once again our 'Travelers Luck' prevails and we find ourselves in the middle of 'Downtown Sleazeville'. Porn Movie Theatres seem to be every other store and the streets are littered with homeless and fruitcases. It's okay though, we're not approached; which might sound a bit 'lightweight' but I don't think there's anything worse than being in a foreign country and not knowing what to do when a loon steps out and stops you in the middle of the street. America is not exactly known for the sanest of personage, so a loony bum yelling at you can be a little unnerving!

We walk for what seems like a few miles at least - along the famous Nob Hill (Powell) and end up stopping for breakfast at Lori's Diner. This fifties style diner offers the standard American Breakfast and our order cook supplies us with: 2 eggs, hash browns, sausage and toast. This is washed down with O.J. and coffee made from fag butts!
Rock 'n' Roll blasts from the speakers that are dotted above every table so by the time we leave we're a little deaf. Leaving also produces an unforeseen problem, we have no loose change and leaving a tip isn't possible. The service was pretty sucky anyway, but it doesn't take the 'guilt' away - typically British (or Swedish...).

We continue up Powell to the top, take some tourist shots then walk through the outskirts of China Town into Fisherman's Wharf. From here the views across the bay, with Alcatraz the focal point, were terrific. We saunter slowly until we see the Golden Gate Bridge, with its majestic peaks stabbing the picturesque low cloud. Superb.

Starbucks beckons for rest and refreshment. We catch up on some tourist guide swotting and try to figure out where to go next.
We come out of the Tourist Centre $300 lighter. We get tickets for Alcatraz and a City Tour for tomorrow and Tuesday is a 6.30 a.m. start as we head for Yosemite. Can't wait!

19Oct/010

Cali – Day 1 – Getting There

I have the flu!
Not the best way to start a vacation, but I don’t really have a choice do I?
I spent most of yesterday in bed and didn’t pack until this morning. This will probably mean I’ve forgotten something … like my glasses!
So we pack, the cab is 15 minutes late but makes up the time pretty well. We make it to Heathrow in half an hour - quite good for 11 a.m.!!
Coffee first, then check in. The boarding cards tell us we have seats 51 B & C, first impressions obviously didn’t count on this guy. We’re dressed up to the hilt (as per company policy) and the chances are supposed to be quite good on getting upgrades … not today!
As it turns out the seats are quite good. Only 3 rows from the very back of this massive 747-400, where the tail starts to crone in. We have the first row where the seats cut from 3 to 2, so Linn gets her window seat after all. My seat is another matter - now remember, I have the flu so I don’t feel 100%, so some of the following remarks might be harsh.
Seat 51C on this plane has to be the shittiest seat in the fleet. The TV in the headrest doesn’t tilt, it flops - I have to jam it into position using a napkin. The headphones in the seat pocket (which are supplied in a sealed plastic bag) are broken in 3 separate places and the cable is frayed exposing the copper core, which is also frayed. I have these cans replaced 3 times before I get a set that work well enough to hear anything.
The most ignorant fuckwits on the planet are sat directly in front and behind us. The woman in front is so big she needs a seat belt extender. She also finds it necessary to recline her seat as soon as she can and leaves it that way for the whole 11 hour flight.
The people behind us are loud monotonous Australians that love the sound of their own voice, and believe that the rest of the cabin does as well. I wouldn’t mind usually, but they talk complete and utter gobshite for the entire journey.
The young girl in the seat in front of Linn farts every 10 minutes and sneezes every 20.
I attempt to watch the shitty screen whilst listening to the sound through the shitty headphones, but Fuckwit #2 won’t keep her window blind shut. Try watching an LCD display with the sun cancelling out the picture going from light to dark every half hour.
I manage to get through most of ‘Tomb Raider’, half a chicken korma, a sappy flick called ‘Someone Like You’ and later I’ll try to watch ‘Shrek’. Maybe a comedy will lighten me up a bit.
My eyes hurt … forgot my damn glasses …

18Oct/010

Cali – October 2001

I found a diary at the bottom of a drawer last week (March 6th, 2006). Thinking that it would be cathartic and fun to publish it on the blog, I jumped into it ... Only to discover that there were days missing and it was incomplete. However, it still makes a good little read. I'll try and find the time to dig out the video footage and see if I can compile a 'highlights' of the rest of the trip and sling up some photos too - in the meantime here's a weeks worth of my visit to California in October 2001 ... enjoy!

   

Switch to our mobile site