The Ironical Chronicle LoLyfe.co.uk

1st Day…

I've been suffering a lot with a lot of health issues recently, (any regular readers will have yawned and already clicked onwards to read something about cats that talk but if you're hanging in there and are reading on... ) and these problems have been exacerbated by the copious amounts of antibiotics that were prescribed to combat said health issues. This past week I've been a pile of itching flesh that has been slowly boiling in it's skin... I've had the occasional spurt of energy but that only lasts long enough for me to walk from the stink pit that used to be my bed, to the bathroom that has has become a hose off area. And here I was thinking that antibiotics were supposed to be a good thing, turns out that the little bit of paper inside the box that says, 'May cause the following side effects: slight itching...' should actually read, 'WILL cause the cause the following side effects: SEVERE itching...'

During this wonderful time of perpetual digit wriggling, I've been bombarded with emails and letters from rude half-wits that work for a company called Q-Park, strong arming money out of me for a parking ticket that I received whilst my car was parked in my rented parking space. I've had letters and emails from my landlord asking why I haven't been to choose my new décor for my up and coming apartment refurbishment (I've been ill, I told them this but they seem to only write mail, not read it). And then today, when I opened my email for the first time since Friday and held my breath as I waded through the piles of junk asking me if my manhood was big enough or if I wanted vicodin for a discount, (both of which cost money I don't have, so I had to delete them... shame...) just in case I had another crappy demand when something strange happened... I got some good news! Yes, good news!

NHK, the Japanese TV station, has offered me a 6 month contract to do a bit of writing for them... I'll be mainly writing feedback and reviews, which is pretty much what I do over at LoLyfe.com without the added bonus of getting paid. So this is not just good news, it's great news - no, it's freaking awesome news because it's news that means when that when I'm asked what I do for a living and I respond with my usual, "I'm a writer", I don't have to feel weird about it any more!! I have an actual contract that states in it that I write for a company! For money!! Not a lot of money, granted, but it's still money!!!

I've been doing an itchy celebratory dance in the flat all morning ...